Forward March Little Brass Band
by eilatansayah
Summary: Sequal to 'A Pirates Life For Me'.


**Ok so I think this is the last story that I'm going to write for this timeline. My intention was always to re-write the beginning of Aaron and Jackson's relationship so that it was in character but also encompassed some of the intimacy that was lacking on screen. I hope I succeeded. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read.**

**I can't imagine this will be the last you hear from me, I still have 'Motionless' to finish and no doubt Aaron will supply me with lots of inspiration in the future.**

**Thanks**

:

The first time that Jackson noticed the weirdness was on Sunday, when both he and Aaron had spent the morning Christmas shopping. It was Jackson's yearly job to purchase family Christmas presents since he Mother had taken off traveling and he'd dragged Aaron to a toy shop intending to buy for his two young cousins. It had been interesting trying to convince Aaron to come shopping with him at all, the younger lad convinced you could buy it all online, "Easy, " he stated, "some comic books for Paddy and perfume for me Mum." Jackson had shook his head disappointed, he quite enjoyed Christmas shopping (the only time he ever liked visiting the shops)and he'd had a silly little fantasy of the two of them doing it together this year.

"What about my present? You buying that online as well?"

Aaron had looked at him in disgust, "we buying presents for each other?" Jackson rolled his eyes, "Yeah I'm buying you a weekend spa retreat!"

In the end Aaron had agreed to go on the condition that Jackson brought him lunch (he was going to anyway), that Aaron could stay outside of any shop if he wanted and that he didn't get brought that Spa Weekend, Jackson had agreed.

When they arrived at the toy shop Aaron had immediately refused to enter, out of the 7 shops Jackson had gone into Aaron had only joined him on 2 and that was because they sold mobile phones and trainers. Jackson was feeling a little pissed off until Aaron had smugly reminded him of the terms of their arrangement. Sighing loudly Jackson had entered the shop and started browsing the toys, the shop was only small and the whole time he was aware of Aaron staring at him through the window, trying to put Jackson off and hurry him.

Jackson turned to look at his boyfriend and crossed his eyes; Aaron pulled a face in response. Jackson then grabbed a pair of comedy glasses from a shelf, put them on and crossed his eyes, to which Aaron started tapping his watch exaggeratedly. Then Jackson grabbed a plastic tiara and a magic wand and started dancing around like a ballerina, Aaron had pursed his lips together trying not to grin, he looked at Jackson fondly as he softly shook his head.

It was that exact moment that something had shifted, Aaron had been touching his hand to his head looking at him with a grin on his face, when suddenly he'd stopped smiling and jerked his hand down before looking around uncomfortably. It was so noticeable that Jackson had removed all the fancy dress items and gone out to see him.

"I'm fine!" Aaron had snapped and that was the beginning, Aaron then decided he wanted to go home and left Jackson to finish the shopping and gave absolutely no explanation.

After that thing's got stranger, Aaron told him that he wanted to sleep at Smithy Cottage that night (which was odd because in the 6 months they'd been together Aaron had probably sleep alone from Jackson a hand full of times) and he hadn't wanted to meet Jackson for an early morning coffee (another thing they did like clockwork). Immediately Jackson felt worried, even though the two of them bickered and argued like crazy Aaron never left his side and never wanted to be away from him. This was the bizarre thing about the younger lad, all his mannerism and talk suggested that he didn't care about anymore, but Jackson knew that wasn't true and he prayed that despite appearances, Aaron in fact loved him.

That next day Jackson had continued texting Aaron all through and was relieved when Aaron answered him. They arranged an evening at Dale View as both Andy and Ryan were out and Jackson was going to use this time to banish the previous strange day. Unfortunately it hadn't worked out with Aaron still behaving bizarrely, they'd been sat on the couch watching a film but Jackson knew Aaron wasn't into it, he kept glancing at Jackson.

"Are you alright?" Aaron had sat up straight as if he'd been caught out and shifted away from Jackson, "Yeah."

"Ok," but he could see Aaron check his watch. "You got to be somewhere?"

Aaron looked uncomfortable "No."

Sighing, Jackson leaned into Aaron, "What's up with you?"

"Nothing," Aaron shrugged annoyed.

"Fine."

That night they'd had sex as expected but it was as if Aaron couldn't relax, throughout the evening he'd alternate between glancing at him and then not meeting Jackson's eyes when being spoken too, Jackson didn't know what was going on but it unnerved him. Usually sex with Aaron would follow with the two of them in twinned , smiling stupidly pleased with themselves, it was one of the few times that Aaron would allow himself to be completely held – too exhausted from their exertions to care about appearances. But that night Aaron had had another strange reaction. They'd been lying together gently kissing when he reached out to cup Jackson's face, but suddenly he'd halted his actions and made to hurry out of bed.

"What's wrong?"

Aaron had started reaching for his clothes, "Nothing."

"Then why are you getting dressed?"

"I'm cold."

Jackson smiled at him warily, "we'll let me warm you up then."

"No," Aaron shook his head not meeting Jackson's gaze, "I'm going home."

"Why?"

"Cause"

"You didn't stay last night either?" Jackson had a horrible feeling forming in his stomach.

"Didn't realize we were joint at the hip!"

"We're not…."

"….fine, no problem then."

Jackson had blinked heavily and watched his boyfriend exit the room; he'd then spent that night unable to sleep. Negative thoughts were running through his head, he'd treated an ex-boyfriend similarly whilst he was trying to end it. Jackson hadn't realised his behaviour until his boyfriend had called him out and Jackson could well imagine Aaron doing the same, especially as he had trouble verbalising anything remotely to do with anything serious. The thought made him feel sick because however much stress Aaron caused him, Jackson also knew that he wanted to be with the guy forever, that night he'd slept on Aaron's side of the bed just to be close.

The following day Jackson had been working on a renovation job in Hotten when Aaron had unexpectedly stopped by with some lunch, he'd been picking up some parts for the garage. Aaron had stayed but was uncomfortable throughout, even fumbling with the foil on the sandwiches and knocking over a coke can.

"What are you doing tonight?" Jackson had asked just as Aaron was leaving, he was testing the waters.

"Erm, dunno" he swallowed hard "why have you got plans?"

"No."

Aaron shrugged, "whatever your up to then..." and he'd leaned in to give Jackson a goodbye kiss except he completely missed the mark and ended up getting Jackson's nose, the whole thing was horrible awkward.

The interaction had left Jackson feeling uneasy, he'd wanted to say more, he'd wanted to ask for an apology for the previous evening but he wasn't sure that Aaron had actually done anything wrong. He also wanted an explanation for Aaron's strange behaviour for the last three days. He had a sudden feeling that Christmas was only two weeks away and that by then he would no longer be Aaron livesy's boyfriend. The thought made him want to cry.

Later Aaron had text with some stupid excuse to get out of spending the evening together and Jackson wasn't sure how best to respond. Aaron only lived across the village and Jackson could have easily of marched over to Smithy Cottage but on the other hand no explanation is better than Aaron breaking up with him. Jackson hated how pathetic and weak he was behaving but losing Aaron was going to break his heart.

Jackson didn't sleep at all again that night and it left him feeling angry that Aaron had that kind of effect on him, he'd wound himself up so much that by morning he'd decided Aaron wasn't worth the bother anymore and he was going to end it. Except he wasn't going to be a complete prick and play stupid games – he was going to tell Aaron straight.

He'd marched straight over to Smithy cottage, not paying attention to how dark it still was, he'd not checked his watch and was using the birds singing as a time indication. The light in the kitchen was on and through the window he could see Paddy sat at the table

"Morning Paddy," he said after walking straight into the kitchen, Paddy had startled and looked at Jackson in shock.

Paddy blinked a few times "It's a bit early even for you isn't it?"

Jackson looked at him confused, before Paddy turned to the large clock on the kitchen wall "Jackson, it's 5.30 in the morning, what are you doing up?"

Jackson shuffled completely embarrassed; he hadn't even bothered to check the time.

"Is everything alright?" the concern in Paddy's voice had been evident; Jackson figured that he probably looked a bit of a mess.

"Sorry Paddy, I must have completely got the time wrong – I thought it was later than this."

Paddy smiled bemused "I'm only up this early cause I'm on call this morning – Jackson go to bed,"

"Yeah," he started to turn to leave before Paddy stopped him.

"Jackson, don't walk back just go up to Aaron." Jackson paused uncomfortably but Paddy didn't take it for what it was, "go on you know that Aaron won't care."

Not so confident, Jackson smiled meekly and Paddy chuckled "and I thought that you were the sane one out of you and Aaron – ". Jackson didn't want to tell Paddy that Aaron was the one making him lose his mind.

Once upstairs Jackson gently opened the bedroom door, trying not to wake Aaron. He was a very light sleeper and stirred at the slightest noise, one way or another Jackson ended up waking Aaron almost every night but the younger lad was never annoyed and in his sleepy state always ensured that Jackson was ok. The landing light streaked into the room and Jackson could see Aaron curled tightly around his blanket facing the door; he had his mouth open slightly and was breathing heavily. When Aaron slept he looked so innocent and gorgeous that Jackson often found himself staring, which of course would make Aaron wake up. Aaron hated being the centre of attention even when unconscious.

Carefully Jackson knelt down on the mattress, willing Aaron not to wake; this was a testament to how worried Jackson was. He desperately needed Aaron not to open his eyes and make some excuse as to why Jackson should leave, for Jackson though there was no such luck and Aaron stirred immediately.

He opened his eyes a crack before focusing, "hay," Aaron began, his voice was thick with sleep.

Jackson lowered his head to the pillow, so he was eye level with Aaron, "hay, sorry I woke you."

"S'okay," Aaron licked his lips, trying to loosen them, "What's going on?"

"I wanted to see you," Jackson held his breath for a moment, he'd shut the bedroom door and it was now too dark to see any reaction, Jackson steeled himself, if he was unwelcome then it didn't matter the time – Jackson was having it out with him.

There was a pause and then he heard rather than saw the smile sleepily grace Aaron's features. A hand then stroked his arm as the duvet cover was wrapped around him; Aaron took Jackson into his hold,

"Soft lad."

Three hour later they had woken for work and Jackson was struggling to function – he'd literally had three hours sleep and that was only because he was in his boyfriend's arm. Over the breakfast table Aaron was staring at Jackson warily, "Are you ill?"

Jackson shook his head, "No, just tired."

Aaron had just looked at him, "Maybe you should take the morning off?"

"No, it's ok," the truth is that it wasn't ok. Aaron's strange behaviour had returned and the affectionate boyfriend from earlier was nowhere to be seen. When Jackson had given him a good morning kiss, Aaron had seemed to enjoy it at first and then ended it abruptly and he wouldn't look Jackson in the eye. Jackson had come to the end of his rope.

"Aaron, what's going on?"

Aaron looked at him unsurely "What?"

Fine this wasn't going to be easy, "You've been strange with me."

"No."

"Yes, since we went shopping on Sunday and I know this isn't just about me dragging you to the shops."

Aaron scrunched up his eyes, "I don't know what you're on about."

"Are you finishing with me?"

Aaron's eyes widened "No!"

Jackson's head rocketed back slightly, he'd been so sure that this was where they were headed, he needed clarification, "no?"

"No."

"Ok, have I done something wrong?"

Aaron couldn't look at him, "no."

Jackson suddenly felt queasy, "Have you _done_ something wrong?" The question was completely loaded; he couldn't handle it if Aaron had been cheated.

"No!"

He bit his bottom lip and stared at Aaron, "Something is not right, please at least admit that – you can barely look me in the eye."

Aaron furiously rubbed his head, he took a deep shaky breath "Jackson I just..." he clenched his jaw fiercely, "I just don't get why you're with me."

Jackson eyed him, "What?"

"Why are you with me?"

Jackson wanted to respond with 'cause I love you' but he didn't dare, "because I want to be."

Aaron folded his arms, unsurely, "I don't get it."

"What's not to get?"

At this Aaron seemed to of had enough, he quickly jumped up from his chair and headed towards the kitchen.

"Aaron!"

In the end Jackson had decided to go to work, he knew sitting around would only escalate his stress even more. Despite Aaron kind of opening up to him, Jackson was even more confused, he wasn't surprised that he'd stormed off, this was after all Aaron's preferred reaction. Jackson just didn't know what to do and at around 10.30 he found himself sat in the house renovation he was working on, legs crossed over one another and leaning against the wall heavily, he couldn't concentrate.

Whilst staring into space he was interrupted by a soft knock at the door, it opened and Aaron peered around searching.

Jackson, whose head by now felt wrapped in cotton wool didn't know if he was pleased or not.

"Hi," Aaron started awkwardly; he had a white envelope in his hand.

Jackson blinked and rolled his head towards him lazily, "hi."

"What you doing down there?"

"I can't concentrate,"

Aaron licked his lips, "cause of me?"

"Of course," Jackson scoffed.

Aaron looked as though he was psyching himself; he moved his body jerkily towards Jackson and then paused, he swallowed hard, "here –", he held out the envelope, "It's for you."

Jackson looked at him confused, "You brought my mail?"

"Open it," and he dropped it into Jackson's lap before moving back a couple of metres.

"Fine," he pulled out two small tickets and brought them to his face to read. "Their Kings of Leon tickets," Jackson couldn't be bothered anymore.

Aaron nodded, "they're your Christmas present."

"Then why can't you give them to me then?" Jackson was staring at him, he couldn't move, couldn't comprehend what this meant.

Aaron was quick to assure, "no, no, it's not what you think." He rubbed his head and looked around the room before taking a big breath.

"Ok," he began shakily, "I brought them a month ago. You remember that you were disappointed that the tickets sold out?"

Jackson nodded.

"Well I found them on eBay a few weeks later, there was days left to bid and they cost me a fortune. I was there for a whole week, constantly checking… it did my head in."

"Ok," Jackson narrowed his eye

"I brought Paddy and my Mum's gift in about 10 minutes – I didn't even check they didn't already own what I got them." Aaron's face then grew confused, "But I spent hours on yours - they weren't even the first pair I tried to bid on!"

"Right," Jackson climbed to his feet, however bizarre this was he couldn't help but smile at Aaron.

Aaron's voice increased in volume and he became more agitated, "but that's not all! I smoke in secret cause you hate it and I've even started wearing jeans more often cause you want and I let you pick films even though their rubbish."

Jackson shook his head fondly, liking the direction of Aaron's words, he moved to step towards Aaron but Aaron stepped back distancing himself, he absently rubbed his arm and wouldn't look at Jackson.

"I'll even go with you to stupid toy shops – I _hate_ shopping!" Aaron was on a roll then, "and you laugh and joke more than me, I don't know how to have fun. Take Sunday, you were prancing around in that fucking tiara and I was watching you and I thought you were an idiot and then I realised that I kind of…, I kind of…"

"Kind of?"

Aaron still would reach Jackson's gaze "… love you."

Jackson blinked, he felt breathless.

"And I didn't know it was possible, cause I've never loved anyone and I didn't know I could. And I don't understand why you would feel the same, I'm horrible to you and I hurt you," tears filled Aaron's eyes, "and you shouldn't be with me because I'm just trouble."

Jackson wanted to cling to his boyfriend as tears escaped down Aaron's cheeks. "I'm sorry, I did it again, I don't know how to behave like a normal person, I couldn't just say it."

Slowly Jackson moved to fill the gap, he held both Aaron's arms in his hands and rubbed them gently, trying to catch Aaron's eye, "Aaron, you cause me so much grief," he reached up to wipe the tear from Aaron's cheek tenderly. "I haven't slept and I haven't been able to concentrate and I've done nothing but second guess you for the last three days and all because you haven't had the bottle to tell me how you feel." Aaron scrunched up his face berating himself, "but," continued Jackson, "I haven't had the bottle to tell you for months –".

Aaron's started trembling, his eyes widened in disbelief, "Why do you love me?"

Jackson held Aaron's face close to his own; he traced the outline of his bottom lip, "Why shouldn't I?" he whispered.

Ten minutes later Jackson had sat back on the floor, leaning heavily against the wall and had his arm wrapped around Aaron who was leaning into him, Jackson kept pressing his lips to Aarons head, kissing him over and over, they were both mentally exhausted.

"I'm sorry, that I cause you so many problems," Aaron said whilst absently playing with the material of Jackson's trousers.

"You're worth the grief."

"You could find someone better."

"No I couldn't."

Aaron paused for a minute, "I guess I will have to buy you another present for Christmas now."

Jackson grinned, "Nah, just re- wrap them," he nudged Aaron gently "wrap them in Christmas paper."

"Ok,"

"Do you have to get back to work?"

"No I convinced Cain to let me have the day off."

"Great," Jackson squeezed Aaron's shoulders, "let's go home then, we need to make up."

They both clambered to their feet and looked at each other smiling awkwardly; Jackson steeled his gaze at Aaron and grinned out of the corner of his mouth, "I love you."

Aaron nodded minutely "I love you too." They then gently leaned in and kissed.

Outside Jackson locked up as Aaron leaned against the wall, hands stuffed deep into his pockets, "You are spending Christmas with me and Paddy aren't you?"

Jackson grinned, "of cause."

**The End **


End file.
